Love is easy...

One of the first lessons I want to teach my kids is about love. Not dating, or birds and the bees, but love. Besides my daughter and I have a verbal contract that she's not dating till she's 30, I don't care if she was 2 at the time when she agreed. It is a binding verbal agreement and no one can convince me otherwise.

The lesson I want to teach them is that love is easy. That's it, that's all.. Well actually, love is probably the easiest thing in the world, its relationships that are the hard part.

I have already explained how fast I fell in love with my daughter, and that feeling never changed and never will. I knew I loved her from the minute I saw her. I knew I was going to be apart of her life for a very long time and that I would do anything for her. I can assume that feeling is going to be just as overwhelming the day my son is born.

My wife, on the other hand, while not love at first sight I feel the same way about her. Loving her is the easiest thing I do. I wake up and know I love my wife, I go to bed and know I love my wife. There is no one else on this planet that I would want to share my life with. She's been my best friend for 13 years, my wife for almost a year, and for lack of a better term my soul mate.

Communication, sex, trust, money, toilet seat up or down, etc can all affect a relationship for the good and for the bad. It is all about how you deal with the bad and remember the good. However, the human brain isn't really wired that way, the good is easily forgotten while the bad lingers it is why we learn better by failure than success. No wonder why the "Everyone gets a trophy" generation is failing society.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand....

Communication is probably the biggest hurdle in any relationship, it is basically what all the other things stem from, even the toilet seat quandry. A quick amazon search brings up over 10,000 books on communicating in a relationship, a google search brings up even more articles, and who knows maybe the "relationship communication" tag I put on this blog will get me a ton more hits.

There are many ways to communicate, words we use or even simple visual clues.  My wife knows when something is bothering me as well just by the way I look, or more often then not, how quiet I am. It is something I am trying to work on, I tend to over think and focus inward in trying to solve a problem but by then the conversation is usually over and it's never in the man's best interest to start the "debate" again. Though admittedly I forget that sometimes... 

Being on the road as much as I am, I have learned to pick up small clues in the way she texts me.

"Morning my handsome husband" - Great

"Morning my husband" - Good

"Morning" - Uh oh I think I did something wrong

"Asshole" - Yep I did something wrong...  To be fair I haven't actually gotten this one... yet...

At the end of the day, I want my kids to find their true love like I did. I want them to be happy, I want their love to be easy, and I want them to realize that while the rest of it can be hard work its always worth it.